So it turns out that drama is actually a protein. It's coded for by a gene located, unsurprisingly, on the X chromosome, although a few XX individuals do show inactivation of the paternal gene, leaving them with only one functioning gene.
Expression of the protein is very complex, with multiple combinations of transcription factors capable of initiating gene transcription, but the following is known:
- Adenocorticoids ("stress hormones") accelerate expression.
- Compounds found in most common brands of makeup can cause a large short-term spike in drama production, along with a long-term increase with continued frequent use.
- Stage makeup contains sufficiently large amounts of these compounds that, in certain susceptible individuals, just a handful of applications can cause an enormous, life-long and irreversible spike in drama levels.
- Through an unknown mechanism, genes associated with low body weight in females are linked to increased expression of the drama gene.
- It is strongly suspected that the raw materials used in the manufacture of many Apple products contain (thus far unidentified) compounds which greatly accelerate drama production.
- In individuals possessing a slightly modified version of the gene coding from drama production, the cascade activation of complement proteins as a response to injury - even a minor injury such as a papercut - causes an immediate drama level spike.
It should also be noted that although alcohol does not "create" more drama per se, high blood alcohol levels drastically increase the activity and noticability of existing drama.
Although the drama protein is present in both sexes, its effect on mental processes differs between sexes.
In men, it often interacts with testosterone to produce yelling fits, violent outbursts, needless power struggles, a need to assert or prove one's masculinity, and occasionally a near-total shutdown of the prefrontal cortex (the "thinking part" of the brain) in favour of the paleocortex, a more primitive area.
In women, drama interacts more readily with the area of the brain associated with social interactions and hierarchies, leading to so-called polarisation of social views: people previously viewed positively are viewed more positively, while those viewed negatively are viewed more negatively. Socially "violent" actions become increasingly frequent as the high drama levels continue. Drama also noticeably heightens the intensity of emotional responses and lowers the threshold for initiating such responses.
In both sexes, drama strongly affects the limbic system. Since the limbic system is responsible for memory, drama has noticeable effects on memory. Firstly, a regular occurrence is temporary amnesia affecting "old" memories. Very often, an individual in the throes of a drama "high" can remember only the most recent events, generally those which resulted in the heightened drama secretion, especially forgetting anything good the person(s) responsible for the drama spike had ever done before the present. Secondly, memories of even recent events often become strongly distorted; in a bizarre example of a positive feedback system, accurate memories are generally replaced with the distortion which most justifies, and therefore fuels, the drama production.
No known substance exists which can directly suppress drama production or the effects of drama on the brain. Symptomatic treatment is recommended.
Some individuals have a genetic condition in which drama production is decreased to a greater or lesser degree, known variously as dramapenia, adramapoeisis, hypodramapoeisis or hypersensibility. The exact mechanism is unknown, but clear heritability and a spectrum of effect severity indicate polygenic inheritance. Although the lack of what is otherwise a common social reaction can cause minor social problems, the disease has sufficient positive psychological and physiological effects - the latter being largely due to reduced stress levels - that treatment is not advised and has not been investigated in much depth.
This has been your Amateur Genetics Hour. Thanks for reading, and see you next time.
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